It’s been two months since the launch of this post-modern war and Americans have done a great job of rallying around the flag, but any moment now, we’re going to have to start shutting down the free lunch.
I know, it’s war, these things take time, there’s an international coalition we have to keep together, but still, there’s surpassing evidence that our military and political leaders have their acts far from together.
A month ago we started bombing Afghanistan and the military talking-head types rushed for the broadcast booths to predict the Taliban would crumble within days, if not hours. Taliban commanders were expected to defect to the Northern Alliance and bring hundreds of soldiers with them. Suddenly we were worried the Northern Alliance would rush in, seize Kabul and establish a new Afghan government, which might not be designed exactly to the specifications laid down by the boys at the State Department. Mere days after the bombing began, diplomats were backpedaling and the Air Force was trying to figure out how to unring the bell, how to keep the Taliban from cracking too soon.
We should have such problems. Three weeks ago, we were afraid the Northern Alliance would rush in too soon, now we hear they don’t like to go out in the rain. This week, Northern Alliance commanders promised they would be in Kabul by the middle of the month, weather permitting.
The air war, meanwhile, was 100 percent successful, 100 percent successful and 100 percent successful. In the first week, we took out the Taliban’s puny and obsolete air force, we took out their anti-aircraft emplacements, we hit Mullah Omar’s house, even though he wasn’t there. Our red-hot intelligence services reported he was hiding in an irrigation ditch. If we knew that, why didn’t we bomb the ditch? We bombed everything there was to bomb, and then we bombed it all some more. We hit the Red Cross a couple of times, we hit the guys who clear landmines on behalf of the U.N. and we kept on bombing.
We dropped leaflets, even though few people in Afghanistan can read. The Russians bombed all the schools 20 years ago, before we got the chance. We dropped food to the starving Afghans, only it later came out that the food packets were the same yellow color as unexploded anti-personnel bomblets. Not to worry, a Pentagon spokesperson said, we didn’t drop the food packets and unexploded anti-personnel bomblets in the same areas, and since the Afghans will just automatically know that, there’s nothing to worry about, but we’re going to put the food in blue packets from now on, just to be safe.
And then we bombed some more. Now we found ourselves in a heck of a fix. On one hand, we’ve said our high-precision bombs have destroyed everything of military value in Afghanistan. Our technology is so good and our delivery is so sure – and there was so little there to begin with – that our objectives were all achieved weeks ago. On the other hand, insiders at the Pentagon, brave soldiers who will only speak to the press on condition of anonymity, admit that we can’t stop bombing now – even though there is nothing left to bomb – because if we do, it will somehow look as if the Taliban has won something and we’ll lose face. Just as that is starting to seep out, Donald Rumsfeld says that because American advisors are now on the front lines opposite Kabul, we are finally getting good information about targets for bombing. Huh? The defense secretary wedges himself between two conflicting policy statements and comes out with a line that manages to contradict them both.
And so we bomb some more. We are now said to be bombing the Taliban’s front line positions. Still no Taliban commanders or troops have been reported switching sides. The leaders of the Northern Alliance say they expect the Taliban units to defect when Northern Alliance troops reach the gates of Kabul, which will be in two weeks, or the week after that. December first at the latest.
I know this all takes time, although I can’t help notice the rapidity with which Congress proposes a corporate tax rebate and how swiftly politicians leap to defend an airport security industry that couldn’t find a baloney sandwich in the bottom of a paper bag.
I’m not asking for miracles – I’d be happy if we got our story straight.
Bombs Awry
It’s been two months since the launch of this post-modern war and Americans have done a great job of rallying around the flag, but any moment now, we’re going to have to start shutting down the free lunch.
I know, it’s war, these things take time, there’s an international coalition we have to keep together, but still, there’s surpassing evidence that our military and political leaders have their acts far from together.
A month ago we started bombing Afghanistan and the military talking-head types rushed for the broadcast booths to predict the Taliban would crumble within days, if not hours. Taliban commanders were expected to defect to the Northern Alliance and bring hundreds of soldiers with them. Suddenly we were worried the Northern Alliance would rush in, seize Kabul and establish a new Afghan government, which might not be designed exactly to the specifications laid down by the boys at the State Department. Mere days after the bombing began, diplomats were backpedaling and the Air Force was trying to figure out how to unring the bell, how to keep the Taliban from cracking too soon.
We should have such problems. Three weeks ago, we were afraid the Northern Alliance would rush in too soon, now we hear they don’t like to go out in the rain. This week, Northern Alliance commanders promised they would be in Kabul by the middle of the month, weather permitting.
The air war, meanwhile, was 100 percent successful, 100 percent successful and 100 percent successful. In the first week, we took out the Taliban’s puny and obsolete air force, we took out their anti-aircraft emplacements, we hit Mullah Omar’s house, even though he wasn’t there. Our red-hot intelligence services reported he was hiding in an irrigation ditch. If we knew that, why didn’t we bomb the ditch? We bombed everything there was to bomb, and then we bombed it all some more. We hit the Red Cross a couple of times, we hit the guys who clear landmines on behalf of the U.N. and we kept on bombing.
We dropped leaflets, even though few people in Afghanistan can read. The Russians bombed all the schools 20 years ago, before we got the chance. We dropped food to the starving Afghans, only it later came out that the food packets were the same yellow color as unexploded anti-personnel bomblets. Not to worry, a Pentagon spokesperson said, we didn’t drop the food packets and unexploded anti-personnel bomblets in the same areas, and since the Afghans will just automatically know that, there’s nothing to worry about, but we’re going to put the food in blue packets from now on, just to be safe.
And then we bombed some more. Now we found ourselves in a heck of a fix. On one hand, we’ve said our high-precision bombs have destroyed everything of military value in Afghanistan. Our technology is so good and our delivery is so sure – and there was so little there to begin with – that our objectives were all achieved weeks ago. On the other hand, insiders at the Pentagon, brave soldiers who will only speak to the press on condition of anonymity, admit that we can’t stop bombing now – even though there is nothing left to bomb – because if we do, it will somehow look as if the Taliban has won something and we’ll lose face. Just as that is starting to seep out, Donald Rumsfeld says that because American advisors are now on the front lines opposite Kabul, we are finally getting good information about targets for bombing. Huh? The defense secretary wedges himself between two conflicting policy statements and comes out with a line that manages to contradict them both.
And so we bomb some more. We are now said to be bombing the Taliban’s front line positions. Still no Taliban commanders or troops have been reported switching sides. The leaders of the Northern Alliance say they expect the Taliban units to defect when Northern Alliance troops reach the gates of Kabul, which will be in two weeks, or the week after that. December first at the latest.
I know this all takes time, although I can’t help notice the rapidity with which Congress proposes a corporate tax rebate and how swiftly politicians leap to defend an airport security industry that couldn’t find a baloney sandwich in the bottom of a paper bag.
I’m not asking for miracles – I’d be happy if we got our story straight.