Live the Dream!

It’s snowing in Burlington today, but it’s never too early to begin planning for spring break.

This year, you might want to throw the kids in a plane and hustle on down to EPCOT
at Walt Disney World. (EPCOT, btw, stands for “Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow” – a rare “triple redundancy” and evidence of just how limited Disney’s “imagineers” are.)

Last week, Disney and Waste Management, Inc. announced a new “green” EPCOT attraction, in which tourists will be allowed to move trash around with forklifts and burn it in an incinerator. (It’s unclear whether this is real live smelly trash or prettied-up Disney trash.)

Disney and Waste Management call this “converting trash into energy” when it’s actually converting trash into dioxin and other carcinogens and depositing them in your kids’ lungs. If your family is rich and white, going to EPCOT may be your kids’ only opportunity to be crapped on by corporate America in just this way. The rest of the world doesn’t have to leave home for the experience, Waste Management brings it right to their doors.

In a year or so, perhaps Waste Management and Disney will add a exhibit on setting fire to your competitors’ garbage trucks and breaking the legs of people who won’t sign exclusive contracts with your company.

Put some ears on that.

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